Girod Street End Zone

Sorry this has taken so long.  To be blunt, I am still just processing everything we all went through for the last week or so, and the month before that, and the season and training camp before that, and the 43 years before that.

At least, I guess you all saw the game, yes?  I can thus spare you most of the now-dissected-and-rehashed technical details, although I am sure Claude will have some numbers for you later.  Instead, The Goat will provide

Impressionist Notes From Miami

As I mentioned last week, The Goat was In That Number in Miami.

Secret Agent Man.  Without getting into a lot of detail, accept for a minute that about 30 minutes before Super Bowl kickoff, I was being taken to my stadium gate in a golf cart.  (No arrest involved.)  Driver was one of those official cap-and-windbreaker security guys, doesn’t say a word.  Right before I got out, stone truth, he looked at me solemnly and said, “They told us not to say anything.  But we’re all pulling for you guys.”

It was that kind of night.  In reality, the Colts had no chance from the moment they walked off the plane.

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Claude Coupee
Lead Correspondent

I just can’t stand it any more.   I can’t.  Can’t stand the hype, can’t stand the ignorance, can’t stand the cowardice.  Since nobody else is going to come out and say it, I will:  We are going to hang at least 38 points on these guys on Sunday and win Super Bowl exlive with a comfortable use of the victory formation.

I don’t care how many experts, pundits, talking heads and retired players are picking the Colts.  I don’t care if Tony Every Team I Leave Immediately Goes To The Super Bowl The Next Season So What Does That Tell You Dungy says the Colts will win easily.  Humans constantly make huge misjudgments, and having a high IQ or having alleged subject matter expertise doesn’t make you immune.  To wit, these guys are waaaaaaaay overweighing what they saw, or think they saw, in the respective conference championship games, and ignoring what happened in 2009 before last week every time a healthy Saints team, especially on offense, went up against a quality opponent:  the game was over by the end of the third quarter.

Let us go through some examples of hype, shall we?

Hype example no. 1:  Dwight Freeney is more than great.  Dwight Freeney is Grendel combined with Deacon Jones combined with The Flash combined with Ernst Stavro Blofeld.  Dwight Freeney is going to single-handedly win the Super Bowl.  When he is hurt, Dwight Freeney becomes a starfish, cutting off the injured limb, whereupon  another one grows back immediately.

Ohbytheway, sacks in 2009?  Saints 35, Colts 34.

Sacks by the Vikings last week?  One.  Jared Allen?  Zero.

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The Goat
GSEZ Founder

The Goat knows dreams.

My friends tell me they have dreams.  Dreams like “I was driving somewhere” or “I overslept and showed up at the final exam right when it was ending” or “I was walking down the street and suddenly I was naked.”

Those are not dreams.  Those are simply manifestations of subconscious recognition of insecurity, inadequacy and, in a number of cases, homosexual panic.  Not that there’s anything wrong with it.

The Goat has dreams.  I dream of hanging on a small planet in a galaxy far away, with Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker, and we go see the latest great adventure movie about a chubby 26-year-old who lives with his parents and commutes every day to his job as an accountant in a drab office building in a large midwestern city. I dream of Arnold Palmer winning his first golf tournament in 30 years and celebrating by doing a Mexican hat dance on the 18th green on a sombrero six feet in diameter.  I dream of watching ESPN the week before the Super Bowl and they are still talking about the Saints. 

Those are dreams.  (I think the second one of those may have actually happened.)

All I know is, I am still dreaming, and there is no more peaceful journey than that through a pleasant dream right before you wake up.  And I am not waking up until Sunday afternoon at about 6 pm Eastern time.  This is one ride I am going to enjoy to the fullest.

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